[for Jayden] cara mio addio
Nov. 23rd, 2014 05:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lowtohighShe wakes up most mornings fully convinced of the fact that she's done with silly, stupid mistakes. She ends a statistically significant number of days having managed to maintain that in the most important arenas.
But it's not every day.
And it's certainly not every night. There are still nights when the idea of sitting at home and doing work drives her up a wall--when the idea of going to see her brother for a 'classy' evening of wasting money on something 'useful' like the arts feels just as terrible as sitting home alone. There are nights when she asks the driver to wait around the corner and pretend he doesn't know where she's going so she can actually breathe deep something other than the rigidity of the life she's been building since Elisha returned and got her back on track.
There can't be anything so wrong with it, surely. It rarely, if ever, bleeds back over into her days. She always drags herself out of bed in the morning, whether she'd fallen into it at 10pm or 4am the night before. She always sits through classes and shows up for work with the same fierce, determined smile. She barely ever thinks of what might have happened the night before once she's got herself set for forward motion again.
Admittedly, sometimes she gets texts at work from numbers she definitely hadn't gotten at the university or the lab or any of her brother's little get-togethers. Jayden's number certainly didn't come from any vetted point of contact. It surprises her, really, how easy it is to extend something of her daytime self to a nighttime number. It's not a line she's really ever blurred before.
But he's coming to the aquarium. She's invited him. Almost like sleepwalking, she's explained to her supervisor that she wants a floor shift out in the actual building rather than holed away doing research. Idly scanning the crowd at the building's tall cement entrance, she wonders vaguely if she's even recognizable like this--flat shoes, hair tied tightly back, barely a stitch of makeup on and her wits obviously about her.
It's entirely possible he'll just walk straight past her. There are large signs for the penguins near the door, after all.
But it's not every day.
And it's certainly not every night. There are still nights when the idea of sitting at home and doing work drives her up a wall--when the idea of going to see her brother for a 'classy' evening of wasting money on something 'useful' like the arts feels just as terrible as sitting home alone. There are nights when she asks the driver to wait around the corner and pretend he doesn't know where she's going so she can actually breathe deep something other than the rigidity of the life she's been building since Elisha returned and got her back on track.
There can't be anything so wrong with it, surely. It rarely, if ever, bleeds back over into her days. She always drags herself out of bed in the morning, whether she'd fallen into it at 10pm or 4am the night before. She always sits through classes and shows up for work with the same fierce, determined smile. She barely ever thinks of what might have happened the night before once she's got herself set for forward motion again.
Admittedly, sometimes she gets texts at work from numbers she definitely hadn't gotten at the university or the lab or any of her brother's little get-togethers. Jayden's number certainly didn't come from any vetted point of contact. It surprises her, really, how easy it is to extend something of her daytime self to a nighttime number. It's not a line she's really ever blurred before.
But he's coming to the aquarium. She's invited him. Almost like sleepwalking, she's explained to her supervisor that she wants a floor shift out in the actual building rather than holed away doing research. Idly scanning the crowd at the building's tall cement entrance, she wonders vaguely if she's even recognizable like this--flat shoes, hair tied tightly back, barely a stitch of makeup on and her wits obviously about her.
It's entirely possible he'll just walk straight past her. There are large signs for the penguins near the door, after all.
no subject
Date: 2015-04-12 10:58 pm (UTC)You okay?
[He points to his own ear and brings it close to her lips so he can hear her response better this time. He's enjoying this, for sure, although between the alcohol and the closeness and the rise in temperature because of all the bodies, he's broken into a thin sheen of sweat.]
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Date: 2015-04-13 03:17 pm (UTC)Her fingers shift to tangle up in the hair at the nape of his neck and hold him properly close so she can laugh against his ear.]
I'm-- great. Are you great?
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Date: 2015-04-16 02:27 am (UTC)I'm perfect.
[Which is to say he no longer cares about the dancing, even though they've only been out here for a few minutes. He doesn't want to look desperate, though, so he doesn't say anything. He kisses her earlobe when he's done speaking, a light nip which he hopes is neither too forward nor too amateurish.]
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Date: 2015-04-16 01:27 pm (UTC)[There's another laugh in his throat for that. There's absolutely a pleased squirm against his body for the brief press of his lips.]
Awesome.
[Surely that means they can stay exactly here all night.]
no subject
Date: 2015-04-18 09:43 pm (UTC)Okay he can roll with this for another ten to fifteen minutes, but by then he's parched from the exertion and his feet are starting to hurt from supporting his own weight and hers. Plus it's hot as balls on this dance floor. He leans down to her ear.]
I think I need some air.
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Date: 2015-04-19 04:58 pm (UTC)She had also been raised to work her life independently. The bob of her head isn't remotely concerned as she leans up closer to his ear again.]
Find me when you come back?
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Date: 2015-04-26 05:01 am (UTC)You want another drink?
[When in doubt, add more alcohol. Maybe that will steel his patience... or his nerve.]
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Date: 2015-04-27 07:33 pm (UTC)--yeah, actually. Grab me a water. I'll meet you back at the bar. Okay?
[She's probably going to leave with him, after all. Probably.]
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Date: 2015-05-04 02:17 am (UTC)Okay, sure.
[He retreats slowly, letting his fingers linger on her arm before he leaves. He weaves through the crowd and returns to the bar, ordering a beer for himself and a bottle of water for her. He drinks the beer in quick sips and feels the buzzing in his brain intensify. He looks around, bobbing his head lightly to the heavy bass line, hoping to pick her out of the crowd.]
no subject
Date: 2015-05-05 03:24 pm (UTC)But what's important--what's getting pent up in a wonderful way--will be brought with her back to the bar. It will have her nails digging entirely hungrily into Jayden's wrist once she finds him again, body squirming to get pressed close again.
He's getting a firm kiss against his jaw before she reaches for the water. Hopefully that's okay.] Still-- having fun?
ugh sorry for delay, rl smacked me in the face
Date: 2015-05-13 01:22 am (UTC)Of course. [He pulls out his phone.] We should take a picture.
[Because come on, he's having a fun night with a super hot girl. Who wouldn't want to preserve this moment for all of time?]
as happens now and then \o/ hope things are calmer now!
Date: 2015-05-13 03:45 pm (UTC)She needs a moment chugging water before she can bob her head in a nod, free hand giving her shirt an adjusting tug down before moving to drag through her own hair.] I look okay?
i can only hope XD
Date: 2015-05-14 10:03 pm (UTC)You look perfect.
it's a lifelong hope, pretty sure
Date: 2015-05-15 05:20 pm (UTC)You know just what to say, don't you.